Let’s talk about feminine men
They’d put Ian Somerhalder to shame.
Having read my fair share of books, I’ve always come across vivid descriptions of the men in the books. The men are tall, have impeccably good abs, and of course, a jawline that could put Ian Somerhalder to shame.
But what I find problematic is, these men are the protagonists; they’re the ones women are supposed to fall in love with.
The entire concept of masculinity is deep-rooted in the folds of patriarchy. Oh yes, the same patriarchy that suppresses women. It’s surprising how most people think that patriarchy just affects people that identify as women. Just as how patriarchy affects women, it affects men too. They, too are, victims of patriarchy-however this doesn’t justify their behaviour.
But, anyway, back to masculinity and feminity- this entire conversation around masculinity, more like toxic masculinity, revolves around men being aggressively masculine(manly), dominating and stoic. This toxic masculinity that people feed men is brutal, if not evil.
Men are sculpted to be stoic and dominating which explains a lot about the society we live in. Just like a spider web is entangled- our lives are entangled around patriarchy too. Every consequence is a cause of patriarchy. It’s surprising how women think they want stoic, mysterious men but end up craving the personality of what they call feminine men.
Don’t women like emotionally opening men? Or men that care about you? Are we still living in the 1800s when men thought of women as possessions they could protect? No, we aren’t.
I’ll be upright, assigning the tag of masculinity and femininity to the two genders- yes, two; because we often forget about the others- is unnecessary and unfair to the one’s that don’t fit into the categories.
While my love for BTS, the Kpop band, has no limits- people have told often me how feminine they look. Don’t you think that’s ethically wrong? Being feminine has nothing to do with a man’s ability to do anything. It’s just a preconceived notion that people have about feminine men and their ability to be manly enough.
The idea is bullshit, and feminine men are as manly and capable as masculine men- in some cases, they’re more.
